I feel I need I feel I need I feel I need
Trying and trying to edit my video, trying to get things done, but my computer is going haywire. Just when I was getting on a roll. Not enuf memory, even tho using xternal hard drive. I think the real issue here is: I don't know what the hell I'm doing. My usual m.o. of self-teach as I go is not serving me so well in this instance. Files are disappearing, crowding eachother, soiling eachother. I watch in helpless horror as my progeny steadily becomes more and more posessed by demons.
Being a longtime practitioner of the cultivation of the fortunate accident, I have to say I've gotten many gems in my day. But the downside of this rogueish technique is that for every lucky surprise there are at least ten disasters. Which I can accept more in other places like painting, surfing, cooking, music, interpersonal relationships, because there I can eventually figure out why things fall apart.
Not so with this computer business. It mocks me and then I have a spaz and then nothing ever changes. Insert the serenity prayer here. Security is a lie; the Buddha was right. I didn't know I was a such freakish, churchy curmudgeon untill my friend 'computer' showed me to myself. It's not a pretty sight.
I guess I'll have to skip surfing and go buy memory chunk for computer before Werkplatz, even though surfing is the very thing I probably need to get me right for tonight's face-off with computer again. I have problems! But unlike 99.9% of the world's population, they are not real problems.
(Knock on wood!)